Had to go to Edinburgh today. Jolly good meetings and dinner with old friend. However, there was a part of my travel that got on my wick....
They go on for ever.
It's worse than the train.
On one short flight from Edinburgh to Birmingham we had:
1) By cabin crew - Welcome aboard
2) Flight deck - Welcome aboard, blah blah, please pay special attention to the safety instructions that the cabin crew are, in a bored, humiliating and frankly unnecessary way, about to demonstrate for you.
3) Recorded. The actual safety instructions including which cavity to insert your sodding blackberry into.
4) Cabin Crew. Keep your seatbelts on.
5) Cabin Crew. Announcement about drinks and sandwiches trolley from which you can BUY stuff.
6) Cabin Crew. Announcement about the special stuff you can buy at "extra special prices" on board (or is that bored).
7) Cabin Crew - Customer feedback forms.
8) Flight Deck - where we are - somewhere above Manchester - who cares. At least we don't have to go there.
9) Flight Deck - 10 mins to landing
10) Cabin crew - fasten your seat belts
11) Cabin crew - please remain in your seats until.... blah blah blah, death.
12) Flight deck - slight delay - external power hook up.
13) Cabin crew - we've opened both front and rear doors.